What to wear?

Nathan's grad is coming up and I have been wracking my brain trying to come up with something to wear.  I went through my closet this afternoon to see if any of my current "formal wear" would work.  Here's what I found:

This is the oldest dress that I currently own.  I got it 9 years ago for my sister's and boyfriends' high school grad.  Besides just being quite out of style by now, I'm going to have to veto it for the sheer awkwardness of having worn it to my boyfriend-at-the-time's grad.  Yes, it was my sister's grad too...no, that doesn't make it less awkward...

The next dress I got was for my own grad a year later: 2003.  I think I'm going to have to say no to this one too, not because I don't still look smokin' in it, but because it seems just a tad impractical.  See, the whole dress is studded with little shards of glass pretty sparklies that would rip the skin off my dear son's body if I tried to carry him while wearing it.  And I do imagine that I will be on mommy-duty at least part of the day, despite both grandmas being present at the event!

What do you think about this one?  No?  Ok.  Moving on...

I got this one for my brother's high school grad back in 2005.  It's ok.  It fits well.  It's not horribly out of style.  Unfortunately, the whole not-being-able-to-wear-anything-supportive thing becomes an issue with this one (if you know what I mean).  TMI?  Sorry.  Let's just leave this one at "I don't think it's going to work."

Yeah!  Now we're talking!  I believe the correct term for the colour of this dress is "hottest pink".  This was a fun one to wear while in my best friends' bridal party in '08.  And it might just work for a California grad.  What do you think, people?  Should I bust out the "hottest pink" evening gown for an afternoon grad on campus?  You're right.  I wouldn't want to upstage any of the actual graduates.  Better keep looking...

Now honestly, when I started trying on dresses this afternoon, I left this one for last because I thought it would probably be my best option.  I got it for Nathan's sister's wedding in 2008 but, I kid you not, it was the only dress that I couldn't zip up all the way.  There was a good 6" between where the zipper halves should have met and where the zipper halves actually were.  To be fair, it never did fit perfectly and I had to work pretty hard to get the zipper all the way up even when it was new.  But 6 INCHES?!  Wow...

So what do I do now?  You have all seen first-hand that nothing in my closet will be appropriate for this event.  I guess there is only one thing left to do...go shopping!  That is, unless anyone has anything that they would like to lend me?