A look at relationship

"I like to draw."

"I enjoy gardening."

"I am in high school."

"I find joy in having a pet."

"I am wrestling with the idea of creationism vs. evolution."

Different things bring together different people. There is almost always something in common between two people when a relationship begins to develop. Sometimes, things that bring people together can be as basic as sharing a space with each other such as in a work or school setting. Other times it is a shared love for music or animals or a certain activity that draws two people into friendship. And other times it is something much deeper: your struggles, your doubts, your life. In almost every situation and relationship, though, these things are different.

Friendship is one of those things that has many levels in addition to the many reasons for starting. Some friendships are completely surface connections. Work friends are often work friends. You see them while you're at work, but that is as far as the relationship goes. Book clubs are designed to bring together people who love to read. Art clubs are for people who love art. Rarely do these connections grow any deeper than or extend beyond the original setting.

There are also friendships which are slightly beyond the basic, but not a whole lot. You get together outside of work. You play together. You spend evenings together, having supper or watching movies. You genuinely enjoy each other's company, but conversation never moves beyond a certain level. These are people you can relax and have fun with, but when dessert is gone and the movie is over, you say goodnight and that's that.

And then there are connections that are deeper. Much deeper. These people know you inside and out. They know what makes you tick. They understand you. They respect you. They share your struggles as willingly as they share your joys. You can trust them. You can share with them. They know you.

It takes a lot for people to open up to each other at a deep, primal level...without weighing words or actions. This level of friendship is a very precious gift. It doesn't happen every day. One needs to be able to let go and know that they won't be hurt as a result of opening up. And one needs to know that they will be understood. To have someone know what you're going through and what you're feeling, and who will accept you...value you...understand you. It's priceless.

All levels of friendship are necessary. All are good in their own ways. Not all of your friends will enjoy discussing a novel. Not everyone will enjoy games nights or want to see you or spend time with you after 5pm. And not everyone will hold you, listen to you, understand you. And that's ok.

Different settings...

Different levels...

Different relationships...