(I looked back on my blog because it was a year ago this time that we went through our discernment process about what was next for us and then ended up resigning from our church (exactly a year ago today!). Anyway, this is what I found. A good reminder for today, I thought)
As I was listening to God this morning, I got this image of Peter stepping out of the boat and walking on the water to Jesus. I was Peter. I was walking on the water with Jesus. The water was my life and I was trusting Jesus to keep me afloat. Then, Peter/I started to sink. It was a fact. The water was coming up my calves…my feet were sinking into the water…I WAS sinking. It wasn’t a lack of faith, I didn’t think. I just took note of the wind and waves around me and looked down and my feet were getting more and more wet. I cried out to Jesus, and he asked why I doubted…why I lacked faith. Well, I didn’t…I just started to sink and cried for help. Then I realized that I’d noticed the waves. I’d tried to make sense of what was happening…of where I was walking. But Jesus said that it’s not about facts when you’re with Him. It doesn’t matter that water doesn’t normally hold people up. With Jesus, it does. It doesn’t matter that we’re not making as much money as we did before. With Jesus it covers our expenses and more than it ever did before! It doesn’t matter that I don’t understand. It’s about having faith that with Jesus it IS possible.
2 comments:
Thank you.
Wow, your entry today shows the value of journalling. I taught Sunday School yesterday and we were discussing the crossing of the Red Sea and how just before they cross, they cry out to God (not in faith, but in despair) because the Israelites had already forgotten their misery in Egypt and the Lord's miraculous deliverance. We talked about how short our human memory is. We NEED props to help us remember God's faithfulness in the past so that we trust for the future. Wonderful blogging, Niki!
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