Saturday, February 27, 2010

FYI - Etsy Sale

There is a bit of a sale happening over at my Etsy Shop, in celebration of...hmm...the end of February?  I've marked almost everything down, some as much as 50% off.  Feel free to check it out...

I'll try to add some new things soon, but I haven't had much excess time for crafting lately.  Too much homework (or guilt about not doing homework) to sit down and create for hours on end!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Driving in the Rain...

Anyone want to see what it looks like outside here today?
Sunny California, indeed.  I just took this picture out my kitchen window a few minutes ago.  It is a RAINY day.  We have had ALOT of rainy days this winter.  It is the sort of day when it feels good to have the heat turned up, and all you want to do is stay inside, wrapped in a blanket, and read your book.  But alas, I must go out.  *sigh*

Driving in this weather is not my cup of tea.  See, I have no problem driving in the rain.  It's not raining that hard, so visibility is still good.  It's not that slippery, especially not compared to fresh snow, packed snow, or roads that are sheer ice from freezing rain, all of which I've driven on in the last year with no mishaps.  (I am, after all, from the Canadian prairies.)  So why am I not looking forward to getting out on the roads this morning?  Well, few Californians are used to driving in less than ideal conditions.  Every time I go out on the roads in the rain, I see at least one accident where I'm driving.  So, while I can be a defensive driver and watch the cars around me, that doesn't always stop someone else from spinning out of control because they were going too fast or trying to turn too sharp.  

I'm sure I'll be fine.  Most people DO slow down a fair amount in poor weather (haha - poor weather).  It'll just be a day to stay off the freeway and allow an extra 15-30 minutes to get where I'm going.  Ah the joy of living in California.  I share this with you so that you can feel as though you're experiencing it yourself and don't feel the need to rush down here yourself and further overpopulate this Golden State.  California has it's beautiful moments - alot of them! - but, like everywhere else, it's not always perfect. : )  And yes, I can hear your gasps of shock from here.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010


I made pancakes at 11pm last night.  They were SO good.  We'd had stir-fry for supper, which never lasts very long, so by 11 Nathan and I were both really hungry.  I used to love making late night snacks (like chili - from scratch - or left-overs) back in high school, so every once in a while it is fun to re-live those memories.  Haha.  And the best thing is there were three pancakes left over.  Perfect for my breakfast this morning! 

Monday, February 22, 2010


I've noticed a shift lately (last 5-10 years or so) away from hymns being sung in churches, especially among the younger generation.  I've heard them described as slow, boring, and irrelevant.  Too hard to understand is another complaint I've heard. 

Now, I understand that some hymns are hard to appreciate (to put it lightly) or understand.  And some congregations sure have a way of making hymns downright torturous.  But I do believe that hymns can be done well, and when they are, they are some of the most powerful songs out there.  Besides, aren't the most lovely of gems often worth a little extra work?

Consider the richness of heritage and history in these songs.  Just knowing that most hymns were written by people who lived in a very different world than us and yet the writers praised the same God as us today is amazing!  And it didn't seem to take the very best worship leaders and the most popular songwriters to write a hymn.  Some hymn-writers were blind...some were in prison.  The huge variety within the hymnal is beautiful.

Sometimes I wake up and I have a song in my head, first thing in the morning. (not very often - I am NOT a morning person - but sometimes it happens!)  This morning it was a combination of "Holy, Holy Holy" and a newer, contemporary worship song - I don't remember which one.  It was a beautiful duet in my groggy, half-asleep head.  As I ran out to do some errands just now, the song kept playing in my head.  And I realized again how much I appreciate hymns.  They are like prayers.  The hymnal is almost like a prayer book.  It is written so poetically (ok, not all of them, but many!).  The songs are beautiful and so full of meaning and worship.

Hymns are very different from worship songs, I agree.  But I also believe that both can be fully appreciated for what they are.  If you are someone who doesn't really appreciate hymns, I encourage you to try listening to hymns somewhere in a different context than usual.  Or maybe just get your hands on the lyrics of a few hymns (I'm sure you can find some online if you don't have a hymnal close by) and read them.  You may be amazed at what you're missing...

Holy, holy, holy!
Lord God Almighty!
Early in the morning our song shall rise to Thee;
Holy, holy, holy!
Merciful and mighty!
God in three persons, blessed Trinity!

Holy, holy, holy!
All the saints adore thee,
Casting down their golden crowns around the glassy sea;
Cherubim and seraphim
falling down before Thee (wow, what a picture, right?)
Who wert, and art, and evermore shalt be.

Holy, holy, holy!
Thought the darkness hide Thee, (still so true!)
Though the eye of sinful man Thy glory may not see;
Only Thou art holy -
there is none beside Thee
Perfect in power, in love and purity.

Holy, holy, holy!
Lord God Almighty!
All Thy works shall praise Thy name in earth and sky and sea;
Holy, holy, holy!
Merciful and mighty!
God in three persons, blessed Trinity!

Friday, February 19, 2010


I just thought of the 
gift idea 
for the twins 
that will be joining the 
McCorkindale extended family 
(Brandes household).  
I am SO excited!  
In fact, when I thought of it, I exclaimed 
so suddenly and loudly 
that Nathan jumped up from his book 
and looked quite worried.  
I can't wait to get started. 
Karis and Jared
you're going to love it.  
Karis a little more than Jared...
but the twins will love it most of all!  
Too bad you all have to wait 
until I give it to them this summer 
before I can post pictures of what it is!  
I just had to share my excitement somewhere...

200th Post!

I can't believe I'm at 200 posts already!  Wow.  In the past I have done various lists using the number of significance on the given day...but I don't think I have 200 of anything that I can put into a list form, and I doubt that any of you would make it through reading a list of 200 anything.  So 20 it is.  (Like a tithe! - 10%)

1.  My parents arrive in one week and two days!  There will be here for a week before they continue on in their other adventures.

2.  I haven't been working on many projects lately.  Well, I should say I haven't been finishing many projects lately.  I have an afghan on the go as well as two baby quilts (that I mentioned earlier).  But the quilting on the latest one kinda shifted the backing fabric - I guess I was getting too cocky after such a good first quilt - so I'm in a bit of a slump, not wanting to mess up the next one.

3.  I miss our puppy.  We haven't seen Lennox for 6 months!  Poor guy probably doesn't even remember us!  Nah.  He remembers us.  But I still miss him!

4.  It is a rainy day today.  Apparently when it is foggy for a few days in a row, it means rain is coming and apparently that clears the fog for a day or two.  Interesting weather patterns here.  Personally I was enjoying our week of sun and warmth...

5.  Tomorrow I have a class from 9am-5pm.  I anticipate it feeling like a LONG day.  This particular class is split up into two weekend sessions.  After tomorrow, I have another full day of this class three weeks later.  Hopefully I really enjoy it, otherwise I'm really not going to be looking forward to March 13!  The class is Counseling Couples, though, so it sounds interesting!

6.  Nathan, as I type, is plugging away beside me on a book that he just wishes he was done already.  It is called "The Souls of Black People" and was written back in the 1800's or something crazy like that.  He's on page 200-something, so he's getting there...but he's not enjoying it!  Sucker...

7.  I bought Nathan a box of Raisin Bran this morning just because I love him.  He mentioned this morning as he poured his bowl of Corn Flakes (with tons of brown sugar!) that he was getting sick of them and really wished he could have some Raisin Bran again.  So while I was out running errands, I picked up a box.  And he was least I think he was. : )  Not a huge thing, but fun to walk in with them just a couple hours after he mentioned that he would like some.

8.  I got the cutest letter ever from one of our friends' kids the other day.  She had been at a birthday party and got a palm tree eraser in her goodie bag and wanted to send it to me because I'm living in California!  And the note was hand-written.  So special.  It is definitely hanging on our fridge with the eraser still attached (of course).

9.  Our house has not been as clean as I would like, lately.  (Obviously I'm running out of things for my list of 20.)  I usually go through phases of keeping it perfectly spotless (yeah right) and letting it slide.  This is one of those slide-times.  Haha.  It's still not bad.  The floor is vacuumed/swept/washed, there are no clothes on the bedroom floor...but the dishes haven't been done in a day and there are papers/books (homework) laying all over our coffee-table, there are shoes piling up at the front door (because we really have no entrance or shoe rack) and the cereal is just sitting out on the counter because I don't feel like organizing the cupboards so that it will fit (because there just isn't room, even if I do organize).  You know the feeling when you live in a place that just never looks "shiny clean" even when you clean all day?  It's hard to feel motivated to work hard when it's a rental and an OLD, rundown rental at that!  But that is no excuse, really.  I should spend a day tidying/cleaning/organizing.  *sigh*

10.  We have been watching Olympics here and there.  We've watched some moguls, snowboarding, and speed-skating.  Oh, and some ski jumping.  We really haven't watched that much, but some.  And we've even seen some of the Canadians, though only if they are doing really well, because let's face it, American coverage mostly just covers American athletes.  Logical...

11.  Nathan just finished his book!  He's keeping a count of how many books he's read in 2010.  He's at 15 now.  I'm so proud of him.  He works so hard. : )

12.  I've got nothing else.  You got 12.  I guess that can be one for every month since I moved over to this blog from ThoughtsFromSecondStreet.  It's been almost a year!  March 18 was officially the switch date, I think.  Wow, it feels like so much longer.  Feels like it's almost time to switch up the blog address again...but don't worry.  If I decide to do that, I'll give you much notice and walk you carefully through the transition so that nobody gets lost along the way.  hehe.

Happy 200th post everyone!

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Busy morning

I have a busy morning of running all over the city for random appointments and errands today.  It's nice when you can schedule everything that has been piling up for the past few weeks/months into one busy day instead of many...but it makes for a busy day!  But I think it'll be fun.  I'm pretty confident driving in our city now.  It helps that American cities are pretty well set up as far as infrastructure and transportation goes.  I just need to jump on the freeway and I'm good to go.  None of this starting and stopping at red lights all the way to the other end of the city!

There's not much to write today.  It's been sunny and WARM lately, but I know how much I would hate to be back in Canada just hearing about it and not feeling it, so I won't mention that.  Homework is coming along.  I have a full day class on Saturday, which I'm not looking forward to (because of the long class hours, not because I don't think it'll be an interesting class).  It's supposed to rain on the weekend, though, so that'll make it easier to be sitting inside all day. : )  I keep thinking that if I just buckled down and did a week of homework straight, I could finish everything that I have.  Ok, maybe 2 weeks.  If I could manage to not be distracted for 2 weeks and put in nice, long 8 hour days of homework, I could probably finish everything.  Then again, the blog would be silent and facebook would feel shunned...and we couldn't have that, now could we?  Haha.  I'm sure everyone out there would manage.  Truth is, I'm just not sure I could!

Well, it's time to shovel my breakfast and keep moving if I'm going to get everything done today!  Here's to productivity!  Yay!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Rob Bell Live

Seeing Rob Bell last night was alot of fun.  It was quite a small venue (couldn't have been more than 500 people there) and we were in the fourth row from the front, so it really felt like a small church service or something.  Except it was pretty different from church.  Haha.  Nathan and I hadn't read his latest book yet, but Nathan bought the coffee table version half an hour before the show started and we managed to read the whole thing!  It's really not a long read. 

After seeing Rob in LA back in 2007, I thought I would feel kind of like we'd been there, done that.  But it was SO different in a small venue, like I mentioned earlier.  He really engages with the audience alot more when there are less than 1000 people there.  Not that 2007 was bad in LA.  He is still an amazing speaker, no matter how many people there are...but there's something about that more personal contact that makes it fun.

Rob Bell spoke on his newest book, Drops Like Stars.  It talks alot about pain and why bad things happen and how those bad things shape us.  A point that stuck out to Nathan and I was how pain can either make us bitter or better.  It really had us looking at whether our struggle with infertility has made us bitter or better.  At points, I/we have certainly been bitter, but overall, I would have to go with better.  Our faith has been refined through this like it would never have been if we'd just gotten pregnant right away.  And while I'd rather already have a babe or two in our home, I AM glad for how God has been working and shaping us and will continue to shape us into who He desires for us to be.

We drove 1 3/4 hours to get to the show and with it only starting at 8pm, it ended up being a late night.  We got out of there (with our signed copies of books and anti-Rob Bell propaganda) just after 10pm, went and picked up our friends' daughter who was being watched by her grandparents and arrived home at 12:30.  Now that wouldn't have been too late a night if we'd been able to get ready for bed right away.  But we hadn't cleaned the student center yet.  We hoped it would only take 10 minutes to quickly tidy up, but we were WRONG.  45 minutes later it was 1:15am and we were done, and TIRED. Poor Nathan had an 8:30 class this morning.  I, on the other hand, enjoyed my freedom and slept until 9:30.  Aah.  When else in life will I be able to do this?

So overall, a good evening was had by all.  Lots of jokes about heresy and how we couldn't be seen coming out of a place like that, lest someone from the seminary saw us. (Rob Bell gets alot of criticism thrown at we were standing outside in line, waiting to get in, we were all handed a "Rob Bell is a heretic" informational postcard with sadly out-of-context quotes from his books...we proceeded to get this postcard signed by Rob Bell himself which made him laugh)

Not much on the menu for today.  Nathan is still in class...I still haven't showered, so I will do that before too long and get ready for the day.  Then who knows...  Hope you all have a wonderful day! 

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Rob Bell

So...I looked at my calendar yesterday and realized that Nathan and I are going to see Rob Bell tonight.  We'd made the plans weeks ago, back in January, and put it out of our minds because it was far away in "February."  But now February is here, and the 16th is here and we are heading about an hour and a half away to hear him speak.  I must's a good thing I looked at the calendar when I did!

Monday, February 15, 2010

Random thoughts...

-  Nathan and I spent a couple hours in Starbucks today doing homework.  It's nice to get off campus together sometimes, even if the activities of campus follow us...

-  I just realized this weekend that the fabric I bought HERE and made into THIS QUILT, actually stretches far enough to make another two quilts!  I sewed another quilt top on Friday evening and have the fabric cut for yet another quilt top.  I didn't think I bought that much...only 1 yard of four different fabrics.  I guess that is quite a bit when each quilt is only 40x60 ish.  Makes for tons of fun for me, though!

-  Today is a long weekend down in the States too.  President's Day.  Whoop-de-doo.  Nathan is enjoying a day without any classes (when he would normally have had both an afternoon class and an evening one) but I'm sticking to routine.  Monday is house cleaning day.  I usually try to wash the floors, vacuum and do laundry.  This week the bathroom may need to be cleaned on Monday as well, and perhaps the kitchen.  Oh, and the spare bedroom.  Ever since we re-arranged our living room and added the bookshelf from the spare bedroom, that room has been a disaster.  And my parents will be here in two weeks!  It needs to be cleaned before too long anyway! 

-  Nathan is reading outside today.  It was a foggy, chilly morning (8 degrees when we got up) and the heat wasn't on in the house, so it felt pretty cool inside too.  But it has warmed up quite a bit and it is now 14 degrees.  The high for today is 19 and it usually makes it at least to the forecasted high, if not higher.  I certainly don't mean to brag, but it really does feel beautiful outside.  All of our doors/windows are open and the fresh air is amazing.  We've had an exceptionally rainy winter in California this year (which we needed), but it is nice to have the sun back.  Don't worry, all you Canadians.  I am not taking it for granted.  I am still a Canadian from the prairies and am enjoying the weather to all it's sunny, warm fullness!

-  Well, not sure what else is happening.  Anyone out there have any burning questions for me? 

Friday, February 12, 2010


I just found out last night that one of my dreams is farther away from attainable than I'd previously thought.

I've always wanted to take a leisurely train trip across Canada.  I'd like to stop at least once in each province and see what there is to see and then continue on.  Just imagine traveling through the mountains and prairies and Canadian Shield and valleys and...everything!  You would get such a sense of the varying Canadian landscapes and cultures. 

Well, to see if my dream was possible, perhaps for this summer (when else will we have a month to dedicate to whatever we want?), I went to the Via Rail website and mapped out my ideal trip.  And then I saw the price of said trip.  And then I knew what we wouldn't be doing this summer. 

So there went my dream.  I suppose it might be a more relaxing trip at a retired pace anyway.  Oh well.  Hopefully trains are still around in 60 years when we retire...

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

A good day for coffee...

A friend of mine, Kelsie-Lynn, once mentioned that it feels to her like she's having coffee and a chat with me when she reads my blog.  I've often thought of that, Kelsie, since you mentioned it.

So today, in my completely uninspired state of mine, I am asking myself: What would I share with you all if we were drinking coffee together and chatting.

Well, I would probably start by explaining that I really prefer tea over coffee and proceed to switch my cup for a good herbal, fruit, or black tea.  My current favorite is a Blackberry Sage tea from The Republic of Tea, though I find that it is quite finicky.  But if you steep a cup just right it is one of the most amazing teas to have crossed my lips.  That said, if the process goes awry, the cup is pretty much a write-off; such is the importance of doing things right. And then the conversation would likely continue.

How's it going, Niki?
(now it kinda feels like I'm talking to myself, but I will push through the awkwardness...this time...)

It's good!  I spent all of yesterday morning in bed feeling sick and sleeping, and spent the rest of the day eating crackersBut today I am feeling quite rested and back to my normal self, so I suppose it was a good day after all!  Sometimes it's worth getting sick for a day...

What have you been up to lately?
(now, I'm assuming that you all understand that if you ever take me out for coffee, I won't just talk about myself the whole time and expect you to ask all the questions.  I WILL allow the conversation to go both ways : )

I haven't been up to much.  I constantly have this feeling of, "I should be doing homework."  But luckily I am not a full-time student, so even though there is always something to be done, I don't really get behind if I am sick for a day or if I just decide that I'd rather do something else (like laundry, babysitting, making things, or cooking/baking).  I also have another afghan on the go.  I bought two more balls of the yarn that I used to make the last one that I showed you (green and brown) but didn't end up needing them, so now I have enough for another blanket.  This one is going much slower (smaller stitch), but that is nice because it means that I have something to work on during movies/tv watching.  Other than that, I haven't been up to too much.

How are you enjoying California?

Ooh...this is a tough one.  The weather?  Yes.  I am enjoying the weather.  No snow.  Decent amount of sun, though it has been cloudy/foggy and rainy alot this winter.  It just feels like we've had a cold summer for the past few months.  A nice day here and there, but overall it is still chilly when you go outside.  Not cold by Canadian standards, but still uncomfortable to be outside if you're not moving.  And if you're soaked while you're out there, it doesn't matter if you are moving or not.  It's just COLD!
What else do I enjoy about California?  I enjoy the novelty of the fact that we are living in California.  That is pretty sweet.  I'll be able to tell my kids that I lived in California for two years.  They'll be pretty impressed...or else they just won't care at all.  I'll take my chances that they'll be pretty pumped though. : )  I also enjoy the different culture.  There is a very distinct Latino culture, especially right in our area of the city.  It has been interesting to adjust to that.

Some things I am not enjoying so much about California.  For instance, being so far from friends/family.  By the time we were finished in Altona, I was feeling very ready to live closer to our family.  And here we move three/four times as far as we were when we were just in Manitoba!  It's crazy, I know.  But it was the right time to do seminary, and the right seminary was 3000 kms from our families.  I guess that's just what happens sometimes.  So while I would really love to be living somewhere closer to our parents and siblings now, I keep hoping that our next move will take us back closer.

Well, I should really get going.  I didn't talk write as fast as I thought I might and it's time for class to start.  Hope you are all doing well.  Nice having coffee with you today.  Perhaps the next time I'm in your neighbourhood we can actually grab a cup of coffee...or tea...or hot chocolate.  : )  See ya.

Monday, February 8, 2010

Reading and thinking...

One of the courses that I'm auditing this semester is Discipleship and Ethics.  It is not my favorite course, but it does have some interesting books and some intriguing discussions.  One of the books for the course is A Wind in the Door by L'Engle.  I read this one back over Christmas break to try to get ahead on my reading and it got the gears in my head turning, thinking about the idea of naming and being named.

When we discussed the book in class last week, I really enjoyed the discussion on naming.  Now, I'm not sure that I have the most clear definition of naming to share with you, but I would describe it something like this: to have someone affirm, either through word or action, who you were created to be.  We were created to be unique people, each with unique gifts and characteristics.  When someone sees who you are and affirms that in you, in a sense they are "naming" you.  They are helping to build your identity.

Of course, with the discussion of naming, we also had to discuss the idea of "un-naming."  In class, the definition that the professor, Mark Baker, gave was that un-naming is when the statement of who you are has a negative effect. Un-naming would be for someone to tell you that you will never amount to anything.  It is a negative effect and you may start to believe that you will actually never amount to anything, thus hindering you from becoming who God created you to be.

All of this "naming" and "un-naming" stuff gets a bit confusing, but it is so very interesting to think of how I've been named (and un-named) in my life.  For instance, I have gotten the impression from some in my life (mostly through childhood, but also in adulthood) that to be a "petite" person is to be less of a person than someone of average height or taller.  Kids bullied me in school and made jokes about my size all through school.  And today, people still just look over my head and speak only to Nathan when we're together.  That is un-naming.  It makes me feel like less than who I was created to be.  On the other hand, as a child I always received the message from my parents that I was a good kid.  I never once questioned whether they were proud of me or not.  Yes, I did do bad things sometimes, but it was never a question of whether or not I was a "good" kid.  And so my identity was shaped by that.  I knew I was a good kid so I lived up to that and became more of who I was created by God to be.  Does that make sense?  Naming and un-naming.

There are hundreds and thousands of ways that I've been named and un-named in my life.  It happens every day.  It is important to recognize where we are being named and un-named so that we can embrace our "names" and make a conscious effort to not let the "un-naming" stick.

As I was thinking about this one day, I remembered a book that I read back in high school called The Giver.  At the time, I didn't think much of it, but I started reading it again last night and it fits really well with this topic.  It has alot of naming throughout the book and it is interesting to see how the names that people are given shape who they become (both positively, if the name was a good fit, and negatively, if they chose the wrong person for the name). 

I highly recommend this book, and A Wind in the Door as well, though if I had to rate them, The Giver would rank higher on my list.  Interesting food for thought, though...

Friday, February 5, 2010

New Etsy Stuff...

Oh, and I listed a couple new items in my Etsy shop.  Finally got around to making a couple more toques/beanies/hats/whatever-you-call-thems.  I have a link on my sidebar (left) so you can check out what's there (it can have a 24 hour delay), or you can visit my shop at
p.s-I've also adjusted some of the prices of a few of the other items.  Once I found out a more accurate cost on shipping, it was so much easier to price everything!


Yes, I do still get the camera out every once in a while.  Especially when I see things like this blooming right outside our apartment block.  I believe it's an Iris?  Correct me if I'm wrong.  There are a few more buds just waiting to burst into full bloom too.  I love this time of year in California!  Flowers are blooming and many of the trees that lost their leaves for winter are already turning visibly green.  It's absolutely beautiful.  Doesn't compare to hoar frost, but it'll do.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Tree Roots.

Trees have roots.  Some trees have deep, strong roots.  Other trees have short, shallow, weak roots.  Do you know what makes that difference?  It's how the tree is being watered.

In some places there are underground springs that the trees receive their nourishment from.  The roots have to reach further and further down in order to find what they need to survive.  And as a result, they are strongly rooted and produce fruit, even when there has been no rain for a while.

On the other hand, in some places there is no ground water, so the trees are nourished from above.  Sprinklers or rainfall provides the tree with water so the roots have no need to grow down deep.  They just stay on the surface and take what is given to them.  They don't dig deep, through clay and rocks and soil to find nourishment.  And as a result, these trees stop producing fruit and begin to wilt as soon as the sprinkler fails to provide and the heavens remain dry.

What type of tree are you?  Do you wilt as soon as the drought appears?  Or do dry times just cause you to reach down further and further until you find water again?

"He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit." 
Jeremiah 17:8

Tuesday, February 2, 2010


Jesus often withdrew to lonely places to pray.

He spent time in silence.

He went away from other people and distractions and spent time with His Father.

I know that I benefit from withdrawing, and it's not just because I'm an introvert.

I know that my relationship with God grows through time spent in silence and solitude.

So why do I constantly fill my life with noise and distractions?

I used to find such life through wandering out into open fields and forests full of trees.

I would often plunk myself down in lonely places and spend hours, sometimes, just praying and listening and, mostly, being still.

Since moving to the heart of a busy city, I have found it hard to withdraw. 

Where do you go when everywhere you go there are buildings and noises and people

Where is the stillness when you can never count on being alone from one minute to the next?

It's hard for me to live in a city. 

Where do people meet with God here?

It's not like the prairies...

I can't just wander out and be alone in nature with God.

And the spare bedroom is just not the same.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Feb 2, 2009 - Flashback

(I looked back on my blog because it was a year ago this time that we went through our discernment process about what was next for us and then ended up resigning from our church (exactly a year ago today!).  Anyway, this is what I found.  A good reminder for today, I thought)

As I was listening to God this morning, I got this image of Peter stepping out of the boat and walking on the water to Jesus. I was Peter. I was walking on the water with Jesus. The water was my life and I was trusting Jesus to keep me afloat. Then, Peter/I started to sink. It was a fact. The water was coming up my calves…my feet were sinking into the water…I WAS sinking. It wasn’t a lack of faith, I didn’t think. I just took note of the wind and waves around me and looked down and my feet were getting more and more wet. I cried out to Jesus, and he asked why I doubted…why I lacked faith. Well, I didn’t…I just started to sink and cried for help. Then I realized that I’d noticed the waves. I’d tried to make sense of what was happening…of where I was walking. But Jesus said that it’s not about facts when you’re with Him. It doesn’t matter that water doesn’t normally hold people up. With Jesus, it does. It doesn’t matter that we’re not making as much money as we did before. With Jesus it covers our expenses and more than it ever did before! It doesn’t matter that I don’t understand. It’s about having faith that with Jesus it IS possible.

Because it is, isn’t it?