A move is coming...

As, I think, you all know, our move back to Canada is coming up soon.  I spend alot of time thinking about our move because...

a) it's a huge change for us...we won't have been in Canada for 9 months when we get back.
b) we'll be busy when we get back...becoming SK residents, trip to MB for 10 days-ish, seeing people.
c) it's the place we'll be giving birth to our little munchkin and that just makes it feel more real.

But living with an impending move is like walking a high wire.  There is a fine balance to be found between living in the moment and anticipating the future.  This move (as opposed to our move last June away from A-town) has me feeling quite a bit more lonely.  I'm not really connected here like I was in MB, so it feels like we're already pulling away from (and being pulled away from by) our friends here.  I'm not sure that there is a huge advantage to pursuing relationships and cultivating existing ones when there is only 9 months of history and we only have 3 weeks left here.  At the same time, we're not back in Canada yet, so we're not seeing our Canadian friends yet.  It's tough.  I spend alot of time alone these days.  Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my time alone...I thrive on alone time...but there's a difference between being alone and being lonely, right?  That's just it.

_____________________________

On a more exciting note, I felt the baby move for the first time last night.  In the last couple days, I'd been feeling what I thought might be the baby - twitches and gurgles and whatnot - but last night I was 100% certain that our little miracle was making a move.  This was one of the things that I looked forward to the most about pregnancy.  It was so hard to wonder if I would ever experience that feeling as we struggled with infertility.  I just feel so blessed to have received this gift.  It is beautiful.  It is a miracle. 

I am praying for all of you right now who have never experienced this feeling, whether I know you by name or not, that God will provide.  There are far too many women who long, month after month, to know this feeling (or know this feeling again), to experience a baby growing inside, and who feel helpless and hopeless in their wait...may God shower His blessings on you...